Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
