i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I don't think brook has ever known best
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
