Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
