Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
