I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
