i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
