dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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