I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
