people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
