did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My vagina just recognized that song.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
