In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
