that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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