Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
