Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
