apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
