elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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