I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Randomize