So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
