My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Randomize
