I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
He did a backflip because drugs
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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