Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
