If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
