need another drink. this is the easiest way
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
