Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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