yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
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