It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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