under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Couch. On fire.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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