when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
