so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
it's great music for shaving your balls
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
