I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
