I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
