Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
