Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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