I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
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