do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
