Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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