I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
