Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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