i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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