Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize