OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
