is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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