Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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