Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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