Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
