I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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