question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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