Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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