my phone cant type all the emotion im having
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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