i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
